Mark McLaughlin got around to asking me today about my screaming a few weeks ago.  It was unexpected, but certainly within his right.  He noticed my troubled behavior of late, and tried to get me to open up.  I was more than a shade nervous about it,  and I certainly wasn't about to explain my stalker to them.  I can hardly believe it is real myself, and I have lived it, there was no way I could convince him or his family of what I saw that night.

Instead I shrugged meekly, looked down at my waffle that he prepared for me, and simply said that I still have a few demons left to thwart.   I glanced aside at my walker, which seemed to answer the question for him.   I do not like lying.  It is a negative emotion.  I should not have done it, and yet I could not bear to be honest.  Is there some truth in lying to protect another?   It is hard enough on them, with their house's issues, without dragging a penance-seeking.....judge of some sort into it.

On the same subject of tall men in my home, I asked Lindsey if she had seen anyone 'strange' outside, and was most relieved when she said no, absently kicking her feet under her chair as she enjoyed a cup of juice.  So why had the Ashen One shown himself to her?  I suppose I was simply under the assumption that only I could see it.  I absently figured that in addition to its host of otherworldly attributes, selective invisibility would be as common as anything else.  Perhaps it does, and the innocence of a child could see past it?

I speculate on useless things, I suppose.   I wish to get within my enemy's mind.  What does it want from me?  It accuses me of horrid deeds, about being immalleable.  Have I not shown my change of heart in life, since the accident?  Have I not been open and honest?

How do I show my true self to a figure without a face?

Call Me Nil