Thursday, May 19, 2011

Shudders and Anxiety

It never occurred to me that a child could see him.
Always with the classic cliche that only those pure can see
what they aren't supposed to. 

My feelings to keep an eye on the children about, suddenly made sense.  If they could see him, what would happen?  Would they scream and run, or find him curious?  The sheer thought, of this malevolent creature being even TOUCHED by a child, has been rampaging through my mind of late.  I cannot let this happen, I cannot let him take a life, not while I can walk.  I find myself lacking in the ability, but not the dedication.  I have no concept of how to even begin warding off this ashen grey monstrosity.

Blue preserve me,  I have a child within my home, and I have his attention.

edit:  It just showed up, in my very own room, well past three.  I  I was sleeping sound, having my standard surreptitious dreams, when I dreamt of a dark shadow over me.  I awoke to find it was no dream.  The creature loomed over my bed, as if scheming.  I screamed.  It had warned me, and now it was here, ready to fulfill its horrid duty, and I hadn't gotten to do anything yet. 

It spoke as I screamed, the strange backlash from its words silenced me, sending me against the headboard, giving me a nasty welt.  "Your time nears."   Disoriented, I don't remember trying to climb out of bed, away from it, I fell upon the floor, trying to crawl away.  It was already before me, I cannot place how it moved, it simply was.  "You have been warned, yet you show no rehabilitation.  You are to be removed."

I was still staggered, its mentality overwhelmed me, words barely managed to form, "Re...habilitation?"  I managed to question.   It paused.  "What do you mean?"  I pressed.   The Ashen One was silent.  "I've done nothing but rehabilitation since my accident.  Both in body and in heart."

It uttered two painful words.  "You lie."

I cannot imagine why it would accuse me as such, I have striven..I have tried SO hard to be honest, humble and appreciative of my life, how could it not see that?

"No,"  I started, but my voice failed me.  It loomed closer,  I had antagonized it by refuting its words.   I had to buy time, I needed more information.

I cringed against the wall, nearly yelling  "Why do I see you now?"    I repeated myself before it responded, "You know why."

I hadn't seen it my entire life, just lately, and there was only one trauma that occurred to me that could have warranted this.  A near death experience.

"The accident."   I finally concluded.   It stood back up, I almost took it as a positive sign, so I continued.  "You are here because of the accident."


"And you will kill me, why?"

"Because of the accident."

Blue help me.
Call Me Nil