Tuesday, April 26, 2011

No denial, no choice

Hello friends, I'm having a rough patch
but it brings me a bit of joy still
when I picture your smiling faces.

I have seen something lately, as if my dreams manifest into reality.  I have seen something otherworldly.  At first I simply disregarded my own thoughts, yet by the third instance, I wondered if something was dangerously wrong with my life.    I have seen a man, a very distorted figure, of very unlikely dimensions, wearing a very sharp suit.

I believe I have seen him before, in my dreams, my hallucinations.  No, I do not believe so, I know so.  This fellow in the ashen suit is here to kill me.  So I have not decided what I can do about this yet,  should I stand up against this tall fellow, tall in my walker, upon feet that are not?  Do I risk transit, driving from this apparition, this strange entity, flee, flee my life, my sole residence and all therein?

Despite all I have said here, about my views, and my world, the impression that I am fully....autonomous, is not the truth.  Since my accident, my life has required assistance of sort, and I fear that leaving here would surely sign my death sentence as much as anything.

So, I have decided that one other option remains.    I choose to talk to it, when next it appears.  I will talk to the Ashen One, and I will hope for the best.  I must, for there is so much more left to my life.

There is a chance I may not survive this chat,
If I do not, Call Me Nil.